I’ve written about fear before. It can be a huge road block. As I get closer to releasing my first novel, I feel that familiar feeling creeping back.
This time, the fear is not about writing at all, but what people will think. My first book, Tied, deals with some intense subject matter and there will be people who are are bound to react strongly to its content. Even though it’s been designated young adult (the characters are between the ages of 14 and 17), some the scenes are more adult in nature, so much so that I am thinking about including a content warning.
I fear what will happen once I let my book out into the wild. I know it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense to worry about it, but I do. There will always be people who have negative things to say. I guess another way of looking at it is if the book stirs strong emotions, positive or negative, I’ve done my job.
Last week, my son came to me, quite upset. He had written a song and an accompanying melody at school, and gathered enough nerve to sing it to his friends. They all laughed at him and it hurt him deeply. I told him how proud of him I was for having the courage to share like that, and that I hoped it wouldn’t discourage him from writing and composing more songs. I think, deep down, he knew there’d be a possibility of being mocked, but he shared what he created anyway. That’s being fearless. I think I want to be more like him.
Photo by Seth Capitulo